Generic Lego Clones - How I HATE thee

Imaginary Gods how I hate generic LEGO clones. It used to be that they were easy to spot in the toy aisle. Bad packaging, hilarious engrish on the box, and colours that made the eyes bleed or looked like spoiled easter candy.
Now they've started putting this crap in packages that if you're not paying attention, or you're a grandparent, or my wife (a hypothetical example), you'll grab without a second thought and give to my son, who will want me to put it together.
Fuck.

Here's why I hate them oh so very, very much.

Real LEGO, the genuine article, the wonder brick of my youth (and currently the wonder brick of my son's youth) is a quality product. Even now, in the day and age when I grit my teeth buying something I loved as a kid, and discover that it has been crap raped by corporate into something unusable (plastic yo-yo's? PLASTIC NONFUNCTIONING SLINKIES FOR THE LOVE OF GRAGLEBLEARGH!!!) LEGO continues to be made to a crazy high standard. The robust "click" that LEGO makes when you snap it together is very satisfying, and you know that you have to be careful because if you don't plan ahead, it can be hard to get apart again without using your teeth. How many people have LEGO bricks that could be used to identify your remains because of all of the tooth marks dotting their surfaces? It's hard to destroy LEGO. It all fits with everything else. It doesn't smell like dry cleaned cat poop.
Then there's the generic stuff. I was trying to put together a plane for The Boy tonight, and I finally gave up in frustration. Bad design that had no structural integrity, idiotic instructions, and the best of course was the bricks that had trouble connecting to each other, and once connected, tended to pop out. The Boy finally took it away from me and broke it up into pieces again, then played with the train engine we'd built earlier out of honest to Bob LEGO.

The only complaint I have is that the square hing seems to have been phased out of the product line. Not on the web site, not in any of the sets we've bought, haven't seen a single one. When I was a lad, my brother and I used square hinges in everything! For those of you who are wondering what I'm talking about, there used to be a a hinge the dimensions of a two stud brick that bent exactly 90 degrees. All the hinges I see now seem to be the "pole and grabby hand" stile, which give you about 220 degrees of sweep, depending on how it's positioned. This sucks for making castle doors and robot knees.

That is all.